This guy kissed his pet snapping turtle and it went exactly like you'd expect

by JD

They're called 'snapping' turtles for a very good reason, but this hapless animal lover just had to find out the hard way and ended up in hospital.

The Chinese man was reportedly releasing the ferocious-looking creature into the wild but decided he had to give it a goodbye kiss first.

Unfortunately the love was not exactly requited and the snapping turtle did what snapping turtles do and snapped him on the lip.

The man, from Fujian province, was left with the turtle dangling from his face refusing to release its powerful, pincer-like jaws.

I've touched on this before, but there's nobody in the world that frustrates me more than people with wild animals as pets. You can't bring a "ferocious-looking creature" into your house and then act surprised when it tries to eat you. Same goes for those guys living with the tiger, except that's way cooler than a turtle.

Now I'm not some animal rights activist or something, but it's just straight delusional to think that animal enjoys being around you, and this picture proves it. The worst part is that this guy probably thought he had some special relationship with his turtle or something, too, when in reality his "pet" was just looking for the first opportunity it could find to bite his face off. 

Go buy a fucking dog. You don't see Mallory from UWO cuddling with snapping turtles, bro.