By JD
Huffington Post: Edward
Michael Alvin, 34, was arrested last week after an off-duty cop caught the man
allegedly masturbating at the Department of Highway Safety and Motor Vehicles
office in West Palm Beach, Fla.
The
Sun-Sentinel reported that Alvin began
masturbating in the lobby of the DMV on Friday.
An
off-duty officer told Alvin to stop, but the suspect ignored him and was placed
under arrest. He was charged with indecent exposure, and released later that
evening.
See this is exactly why I could never be a cop. If I was
off duty and I saw a guy jerking off in the DMV, I’d probably just turn my head
and pretend I didn’t see it. I don’t know if that speaks more to the West Palm
Beach Police Force’s work ethic or mine, but that’s neither here nor there. I
mean he’s not hurting anyone, just wailing away on himself while he waits for his number to get called. Some people play Candy Crush on their phones to pass the time, this guy beats his dick in public. Different strokes.
Frankly, if we’re being honest with each other here,
I’m pretty impressed with Edward Alvin. I don’t think I could get a hard-on at
the DMV. Worst place in the entire world.
Only place I could think of that would be worse is the hospital – which reminds
me, if any of the Lappers or Lapettes know someone that’s spent extended time
in the hospital – do people masturbate in there? They must, right? But how?
Somebody let me know.
When my cousin was in the hospital with severe shingles he used to masturbate in his parapalege roommates coffee while he was sleeping. Don't ask how i know this. But he said all aspects of the scenario made him feel more manly.
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